A Trip Into Darkness
by Moixx
Summary: Another domestic violence case. Another dead woman. What happens when this time the case is connected a lot closer to Sara than before? They had one beautiful night with her, holding her hand and talking to her softly, and then she was gone. Chapter 10!
1. Chapter 1

This is a Sara-centered fic. In future chapters it goes into her past in detail. It will only be my take on her past. CSI is not mine. Please review if you enjoy the story or you have some criticism about it. Thanks for reading.

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A telephone rang in the darkness waking up a sleeping Sara. She fumbled for the lamp beside the bed and switched it on. She waited for her vision to adjust to the darkness before she could see the phone beside the lamp, vibrating and showing Grissom as the caller.

'Sidle,' she answered sleepily.

'Hey Sara, it's Grissom. Sorry to call you in on your night off but I really need you to help Catherine on a case.'

'Sure Grissom. Where is it at?'

After taking note of the address Sara quickly got dressed and ran out the door. She arrived at the scene not long after the call from Grissom. Catherine was already there collecting evidence. The victim was a woman. She was found dead in a dumpster behind a Chinese restaurant not far from the Strip. Sara walked up to Catherine who was bent over picking up a cigarette butt with a few brown evidence bags at her feet. She looked around the scene, the alley was dark and would have gave anyone the creeps walking through this on a dark night.

'Hey Catherine. Where do you want me?' Sara asked nicely.

'Um.. well I've got the scene, although I'm not finding much. Why don't you go with the body?' Catherine replied signalling to David arriving in the coroner van.

'Sure. I'll catch you back at the lab.'

When Sara arrived back at the lab she headed straight to the Morgue, even though she knew she would have beaten the body back. So she waited. It arrived a few minutes later.

With camera in hand, she looked over the body before anyone started on it. The victim was a woman, about mid-thirties. Sara photographed the bruises on her face, her arms and throat. She knew the blue pyjamas she was wearing hid the rest of them. Not all the bruises were fresh. The ones on her throat were a deep purple while some on her arms were turning a yellow colour. Sara choked back a sob. She couldn't lose it again on another domestic violence case, she just couldn't.

Concentrating, Sara scraped under the woman's nails hoping she scratched her attacker. She also collected some black fibres attached to her cotton pyjamas. She collected the woman's fingerprints and DNA to try and determine who she is. Sara left after she was done to leave Doc Robbins to perform the autopsy.

Back at the scene Catherine found tire treads which she hoped were linked to the case. She also found cigarette butts, which she believed belonged to the employees of The Ying Duck restaurant, which was where the body was found behind. The garbage from the dumpster the victim was found in was also collected to examine back at the lab.

In the lab, Sara had come up blank with the identity of Jane Doe. She was about to go back to the Morgue when a match came up for the black fibres found on her clothes.

Sara held the results in her hands. The results showed the fibres were from a car's interior. A Volvo car to be exact. That hardly narrowed the search down much, but it was a start. Walking towards the Morgue she ran into Catherine and they updated each other on their finds before both heading to meet Doc Robbins.

'Well hello ladies,' Doc Robbins greeted them as they walked through the doors of the Morgue.

'What can you tell us Doc?' Catherine replied. Both her and Sara's eyes focused on the bruises covering the woman's body.

'Well cause of death was a broken neck. She had suffered many fractures to her arms and wrists, 2 fractured ribs, a broken nose and a dislocated shoulder. Many not recent.' He handed Catherine a list of injures and approximately how long ago they occurred. He continued, 'Estimated time of death is 6 hours ago. That's all I have for you.'

'Thanks Doc,' Sara said, before she walked out the room followed by Catherine.

'Sara!' Catherine shouted to make her stop. Sara turned around. 'I don't want you getting your emotions out of control on this case. I mean it Sara. If you can't handle it then I will get Grissom to switch you with Nick or someone.' Her tone was sympathetic but Sara could tell she was a bit pissed off.

'I'm okay Catherine. I can handle it.' Sara replied calmly, which made Catherine believe her.

'Okay then. You check medical records and try and find out who our Jane Doe is. I will be going through some garbage.' She added with a grimace.

After 3 hours going through medical records, Sara found nothing. Every face of a battered woman took her back to her childhood, watching her mother try unsuccessfully to cover the bruises her father had gave her in another drunken rage. But Sara composed herself and thankfully hadn't lost it.

Walking into the layout room, Sara paused watching Catherine combing through the garbage bags.

'I found nothing on medical records. You got anything here?'

'Nope. Just ordinary garbage from the restaurant. Cigarette butts checked out as employees from the restaurant. The tire treads however came back belonging to a Volvo. Didn't you find fibres from a Volvo on Jane's clothing?'

'Yep. So what you thinking? Body dumpedby a Volvo?'

'Exactly what I am thinking. I got Greg running a search on all Volvos in the city but the list is going to be big.' Catherine replied. At that moment Greg came into the room holding a bundle of papers.

'Hey Sara, Catherine. I got the list of all the Volvos,' he dropped the bundle on the table with a thud. 'All 1,075 of them.' Catherine and Sara both let out a sign simultaneously.

Catherine looked at her watch. 'How about we call it a day, Sara? Maybe by tomorrow someone would have reported her missing.'

'Okay. See ya tomorrow then.' Sara walked into the locker room to get things and go home.

Walking into her apartment she debated whether or not to go to bed. Only she knew the nightmares she would face if she did attempt to sleep. So she made a cup of coffee and turned on her stereo and prepared for a long night to stay awake.


	2. Chapter 2

This is a Sara-centered fic. In future chapters it goes into her past in detail. It will only be my take on her past. CSI is not mine. Please review if you enjoy the story or you have some criticism about it. Thanks for reading.

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Sara had successfully stayed awake all night and was now getting dressed for work. Three cups of coffee later and she was ready. She got into her car and drove the short distance to work. When she arrived Catherine was already sitting in the break room.

'Hey Cath. So what do we start with today?' Sara asked.

'Oh hey Sara. You have a B&E with Nick today. I got paperwork.' Catherine replied.

'What about our Jane Doe?' Sara's voice was a mix of anger and sorrow. Catherine noticed this.

'Listen Sara. We got no leads. No evidence. We don't know who she is and until then we have nothing to do for this case.'

'You're right Catherine.' Catherine then watched Sara swiftly walk away.

So Sara went and found Nick and together they solved their B&E. And Sara got started on the next case. And the next. Days passed since their Jane Doe and before Sara knew it weeks had passed. A full month had gone by without anyone reporting her missing until one day.

Sara arrived at work one day and found Catherine talking to Brass with a big smile on her face.

'Hey Cath. What's up?' Sara asked suspiciously.

'Great news Sara. We may have an ID for our Jane Doe. A teacher at Las Vegas Elementary found some bruises on a young boy in her class, so she called in social services. The social worker went to talk to the parents and could only find the dad so she spoke to the son and he said his mom just left one night about a month ago. We showed a picture of our Jane Doe to the boy and he is certain it is his mom. We got a DNA test running to confirm it.'

Sara smiled. 'That's great. Lets bring in the husband.'

'Um.. About that. After social services got involved he did a runner, with his three children. Leonard is ten, Kate is six and Jessica is only two. We got Brass' guys out looking for them now, but it's not looking good he, he could be anywhere by now,' Catherine continued, her tone a lot less optimistic.

'So what do we do now?'

Catherine smiled and held up a piece of paper with an address on it. 'Search the house.'

The left for the car right away and started on the way to the home. The silence between Catherine and Sara was irritating.

Sara looked uncomfortably at Catherine. 'What was her name?' she asked in a small voice. Sara wanted to know the name of the woman who had haunted her thoughts for a month.

'If it all checks out her name is Carol Smith.' As if on cue Catherine's cell phone rang.

'Willows.' She answered confidently. Sara couldn't hear what the person on the other side was saying.

'That's great Greg. Thanks.' She hung up and glanced over at Sara. 'It's Carol Smith. DNA came back a match.'

The silence returned but this time it was a little more calming.

They arrived at the house not too long after the phone conversation. Sara looked around the neighbourhood. Dogs were barking in the distance, trash cans and bags were scattered all over the sidewalk and the actual building itself was old and looked dangerous. Climbing the stairs to the apartment the family lived in, Sara couldn't help but notice the smell of urine and rot. The peeling wallpaper made it anything but welcoming. Three floors up and they were there.

After entering the apartment, both Catherine and Sara wished they hadn't. The rooms were a mess with trash all over the floor, broken toys scattered everywhere and the horrible smell of damp and faeces. After choking back vomit Catherine looked over to Sara.

'You take the two bedrooms and I will take in here.'

Sara simply nodded in reply and went to work.

The first bedroom was the smallest but Sara guessed it was the children's room. There was only one bed and a drawer with a blanket, which would have been used as a cot for Jessica, the two year old. Empty cans of cola and bottles of water filled a large bucket being used as a bin.

After collecting various items as evidence Sara brought out her ALS and shined it over the small bed. She let out a gasp as the light made the stains visible. After taking a few photographs and collecting the sheets she went and found Catherine.

'I found semen on the children's sheets. I am just about to start on the parent's room,' Sara said slowly.

Catherine nodded. However hard it was to cover up, this case was getting to her too.

In the kitchen Catherine didn't find anything useful, just expired milk and barely any food. The bathroom was also filthy but again nothing useful was found. Catherine went to go help Sara in the parent's room.

'Hey. Need any help in here?' Catherine asked.

'Nope. Nothing in here. You find anything?'

'Not really. It's what I didn't find what was weird. Look around.' Catherine paused as Sara looked around the room. 'Where is all the photographs? This is a family with 3 children and there is no pictures anywhere.'

Sara hesitated. 'Maybe they didn't have any occasions to capture on picture. Take a look at the house Catherine, this hardly seems like a family that would care about their children enough to take pictures.'

'Fair enough. Want to get this back to the lab?' Catherine replied quickly to change the subject. Sara just nodded in reply.

Back at the lab, Sara dropped off the sheets into DNA and went to work sorting through bills and letters she collected from the house. The phone bill was surprisingly thin with the only outgoing calls to local takeaway restaurants, one of which was The Ying Duck, the restaurant Carol Smith's body was found behind. Incoming calls were from the school and not from any residential numbers which could have been friends or family.

After updating Catherine on the phone records she went to DNA to collect the results. It didn't surprise Sara when it showed the two DNA donors on the sheets were Bradley Smith, Carol's husband, and a close relative, presumed to be their oldest daughter.

Bradley Smith was a violent man. His DNA had been on file as he had been arrested twice before for common assault on his wife and had also been arrested for armed robbery of a convenience store. Sara couldn't imagine what his children were going through at that moment. If they were still with him. She hoped it was only a matter of time before he was found and put in prison.

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Thanks for all the reviews I have gotten so far. Hopefully you won't need to wait too long for the next chapter. Keep reviewing and I will keep updating. It will get a lot more personal for Sara in the next chapter. 


	3. Chapter 3

The image of Carol Smith in Sara's dreams had been replaced by her violent husband, Bradley. The picture on his criminal record was a few years old, but still Sara couldn't forget his face. His messy hair made him look like a drunk and his scruffy beard made him appear 10 years older. It was not a face Sara would have liked to have seen on a dark night in Vegas.

In a bizarre way, the face of Bradley Smith was familiar to Sara. She couldn't pinpoint where from, but the thought that this man was recognizable worried her. The thought that she should inform Catherine of the possible connection crossed her mind, but was later dismissed by the fact it wasn't overly familiar and Sara reassuring herself it was probably a coincidence.

Another night for Sara was spent dreaming about the Smith family. She felt like a child again, hiding from her father and daydreaming about her escape. Now she could only imagine what it is like now for the children of Bradley Smith.

Sara couldn't sleep again that night so she decided to go into work early and get some work done. It was noon when she arrived back in the lab and she wasn't expecting Catherine in. With the case file under her arm, Sara went straight to the break room and grabbed a cup of coffee. Sipping on the hot liquid, she opened the folder and once again the lifeless, bruised face of Carol lay before her eyes.

Neither of the Smith parents had any family that Bradley could have ran to and it was believed there was no close friends because of the non-existent outgoing phone calls or mail. Carol was a waitress at a local café and Bradley was unemployed thought to be a drunk as the beer cans collected at the house were all his.

Every word in the file had been reread at least three times by Sara and still she was no closer to finding Bradley or his children. They were dust in the wind. Exhausted, Sara lay her head on her arms and rested her eyes for a few minutes before Jim Brass walked in.

'Oh hey Sara. I was not expecting to see you here,' Brass said, causing Sara to wake up.

'Hey Jim. What you doing here? I thought you would have been off home by now.'

Brass shrugged and gave a smile. 'I have no life.' He paused. 'Actually I got called in, suspect Bradley Smith was detained in California robbing a bank believe it or not. He is getting shipped back here now.'

Sara's eyes grew wide. 'And the children?'

'Were in a hotel room, they are getting brought back here too by child services.'

Catherine walked in at that moment. 'Hey Sara. I was about to call you, we got some good news.' She greeted the brunette.

'I heard Cath. How long before they get here?'

'About 3 hours I'm guessing.'

'Well ladies. I will need to leave you now. I have some business to take care of.' Brass interrupted before waving goodbye. The two women thanked him before he left.

'Listen Sara,' her tone now serious, 'if you can't handle the husband I will understand. I can't have you losing it with him.'

'It's okay Catherine. I can handle it.' Sara replied immediately.

'Well I am going to go get the evidence in order, you get some sleep. I'll come wake you when they arrive at the station.' Catherine said before leaving the room.

Sara ignored Catherine's advice and continued reading the case file.

Three hours later, just as Catherine predicted, Bradley arrived in Vegas. Catherine had come to collect Sara so they could drive to the station together only to find she had already left.

In the police station Sara sat opposite the 10-year-old boy, watching him colour in a picture of a dinosaur. She wasn't ready to face the husband yet but she was okay to talk to the children.

'So tell me about your daddy.' Sara spoke softly to the boy as his two sisters sat in the corner playing with two dolls the social services lady brought them.

As soon as Sara spoke, Leonard put down the crayon and stared deep into her eyes. 'Daddy doesn't it like it when we talk to strangers.'

'It's okay to talk to me,' she took out her ID badge. 'See. I am a police officer.'

He smiled as he reached out to hold the badge. He held it softly in his small hands. 'Daddy hurt mummy a lot. He hurt Kate a lot too.' He looked over at his younger sister. 'He would sleep a lot of the time, but we had to be really quiet. Mommy tried to make him not hit us, but then he just hurt her.'

'Do you remember when your mommy left?'

He nodded. 'Daddy had been really mad that day. They were fighting on the stairs and he got really angry so he pushed her and she fell. We never her saw her after that and daddy hurt Kate a lot more when she was gone.'

Sara took the small boy by the hand and squeezed it gently. 'It's going to be okay now.'

Sara looked up at a tapping on the glass door. Catherine stood behind it not looking too pleased. Sara let go of Leonard's hand and walked out into the hallway ready to face the wrath of Catherine Willows.

'Thanks a lot Sara! You start without me? I'm lead on this case Sara! That means you wait for me to start!' Her voice was angry but not loud to avoid causing a scene.

'I'm sorry Catherine. I couldn't just sit there. I was just talking to the son.' Sara shot back defensively.

Catherine sighed. 'Whatever. Lets just go talk to the husband, Sara. We already got enough to charge him with the murder of Carol.'

Sara stood in the middle of the hallway. 'He pushed her down the stairs in the middle of a fight, while their children watched.' Her voice was quite and slow.

Catherine sensed Sara's pain. 'We got him Sara. That's all that matters now.'

Walking along the corridor to Interrogation Room 1, Sara dreaded going inside as she was afraid of losing it again with Catherine there watching. But she took a deep breath and opened the door to the room and stepped inside.

Bradley Smith's appearance had changed since the photograph on his record had been taken. Gone was the beard that aged him, gone was the straggly, messy hair, which made him look unfamiliar. Sara stared at the man she once knew sitting alone in the room. She felt sick to be familiar with him. And Sara knew that the past she took 20 years hiding was once again going to be resurfaced.

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Okay next chapter is the one you have been all waiting for, I hope it isn't a big disappointment. Keep reviewing and I shall keep updating. 


	4. Chapter 4

Well here is the chapter. I'm not so sure it's a good chapter but review if you hate it and I will see what I can do.

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Sara froze in the doorway as the man watched her. She was unable to move, to speak. Instead Bradley smiled back at her. 

'Well, Well.' He paused while watching Sara with an evil glint in his eye. 'The last time I heard about you was about, 20 years ago. Working as a hooker in Los Angeles, I believe.'

Catherine stood frozen to the spot, her mouth hanging slightly open, equally shocked as she learned Sara worked on the streets and also that she knew Bradley Smith.

'What a way to meet again eh Sara?' His voice was confidence and powerful.

Sara approached one of the chairs opposite him and sat down. Catherine, unsure what to do, followed suit and sat at the other chair. A moment's silence followed before Sara took a deep breath and spoke.

'Smith?' She asked curiously.

'I changed my name after it happened. I didn't want to be connected with our family after something like that. I had a reputation to keep up.' He answered boldly.

Sara let out a sarcastic laugh. 'If you end up doing the exact same thing then you are still connected.'

Catherine sat silently, not having a clue what was going on. Every shred of professionalism inside her told her to get Sara out of the room and interview the suspect. But still she didn't make a move.

'So you've cleaned yourself up then sis?' He didn't wait for an answer. 'Well I am happy for you girl, really I am. At least one of us made it out of that screwed up family to have a decent life.'

'Don't you dare! Don't you dare use that as an excuse for what you have done! If anything you would have tried your hardest to not turn out like him. How could you do that to you own daughter? While you made your own son watch just like he did? And to do that to your own wife. Do you remember how we used to beg him to stop? Did your children beg for you to stop? Did you turn on them like our own father used to?' Sara shot back at him.

Bradley looked down at his lap. 'I'm not proud of what I did Sara. What happened with Carol was an accident! I swear to you, I didn't plan it like mom did. It just happened..'

'We know what happened. We have evidence. We have your son who saw it all. We got you for murder Brad.'

Sara stood up and walked out the room. Catherine stayed seated, still astounded by what just happened. The man before her was Sara's brother. His dark eyes moved from the spot where Sara had sat towards Catherine.

'I guess you have some questions to ask me then.'

Catherine nodded slowly.

'Well don't bother. I killed her. I pushed her down the stairs one day and hid her body in a dumpster.'

Catherine paused. So he just admitted the murder. 'Did you abuse your daughter?'

The man looked up at her and smiled. 'Yes I did that too.'

Catherine sighed and then signalled to the police officer standing behind Bradley. 'Get him out of here.'

Catherine sat in the empty room contemplating what to do. She didn't know if she should go and find Sara and ask her if she wants to talk about it. She knew Sara was a private person. In the end Catherine decided to go find Sara.

Searching the station, Catherine discovered she wasn't there. So she drove back to CSI to see if she went back there.

'Hey Grissom,' Catherine greeted walking into his office. 'You seen Sara around?'

'Well hello Catherine. Sara asked if she could leave early today. She looked a bit upset did something happen?' Grissom looked up at Catherine.

Catherine looked uneasy at his question. But she knew he would need to know. 'Sara's brother was the victims husband. He murdered her.' Before waiting to hear his reply she left his office en route to Sara's apartment.

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So you know what to do. REVIEW! This has been my most popular story so far soI appriciate everyone reading. 


	5. Chapter 5

Catherine sat outside Sara's apartment building inside her car. She was unsure what she could say to her.

Inside the apartment Sara sat sipping a beer with tears running down her face as she remembered the things she went through as a child. In the space of a day she had found her brother had turned out just like their father and also she was an Aunt. She looked through the bundle of papers Anne, the social services lady, had given her to look through.

Sara remembered the conversation she had with Anne.

'Miss Sidle?' Sara was about to walk out the police station when a woman approached her. 'My name is Anne Black, I am the social worker of the Smith children.'

Sara nodded slowly.

'I have been informed that you are the children's Aunt.'

'Yes.' Sara replied nervously.

'I would like to give you these papers to look over. I understand if you can't take custody of them but you are the only family they have. Please take some time to think about it.'

'Well, I will give it some thought.' Sara responded taking the bundle of papers and walking quickly away.

Now she was sitting here thinking about what to do. To take on three children she didn't even know was a huge decision to make. She would need to move to a bigger place, research schools, probably move shift, find a daycare for Jessica, buy toys and furniture and everything else children need. Did she really want the responsibility? She was just so overwhelmed.

She was brought out of her thoughts by a knock at her door. She looked up and walked over, looking through to see who it was. Catherine. Sara quickly wiped away the tears and opened the door letting Catherine inside. She walked in without speaking a word. Neither did Sara.

Catherine watched as Sara strolled by her and sat down on an armchair not far from the door. She turned around and closed the door that was left open and joined Sara by sitting on her couch beside the chair.

Sara had her eyes focused on a plant in the corner of the room, completely ignoring Catherine sitting beside her. Slowly she began to tell her everything.

'Bradley used to protect me, when I was a child, from our father. When he wasn't passed out drunk or out at a bar, he was beating up our mom. If we tried to stop him he would turn on us. One of my first memories is me lying in my bed one night and my dad walking through my bedroom door. Bradley did his best to stop it, he really did, but he always ended up bruised and bleeding. When I was 8, he left home and I hadn't seen him since then, until today. In a way, I blame him for leaving. It got a lot worse at home after that but if it were me I would have left too. When I was thirteen, my mother had enough and stabbed him to death. I went into foster care. It was a lot worse there; I'm talking about the foster parents. The dads and older boys used you for one thing and the mothers really couldn't care less about you. The other kids stole your stuff. I ran away after a year of getting moved around homes and finding out they were all the same. I started working on the streets to get money.' Sara paused for a minute. Still not making eye contact. She gave a light chuckle. 'I will anyways remember what this one guy said to me once. "So what did your daddy do to you?" At first I didn't understand what he meant. I remember he looked at me knowing I didn't understand. "In my experience, most girls in your line of work have had major daddy issues. So what's your story? Did he hit you, fuck you or leave you?" I never answered him. But it made me think. It just gave me an excuse to blame him more than I already did.' The tears started flowing from her eyes again.

Catherine sat staring at her throughout the whole speech not knowing what to say. 'I'm so sorry Sara.' Her voice was soft and sympathetic. At the last part of what Sara said, Catherine also started to think. When she was a stripper someone said the same thing to her. But compared to Sara, she was lucky. Her father never hurt her; he was just never there.

'I thought he was dead. After a few years working on the streets I got into night school. I worked so hard at that, and after a few years I went to Harvard. But I had started looking for him. I got an investigator to try and find him and he couldn't. The guy said he was probably dead, so I gave up. Maybe if I kept looking for him.. maybe he wouldn't have turned out like that.'

'It's not your fault Sara. Some people are just like that.'

'I once asked Grissom if he thought there was a murder gene. He said 'I don't think genes are a predictor of violent behaviour.' Do you think he will change his answer now?'

Catherine didn't say anything. The silence between them continued and Catherine was frantically trying to think of something to say. Something on the table in front of them caught her eye and she picked it up.

'You are taking custody of the kids?' She asked shocked.

Sara shrugged. 'I'm thinking about it. I'll need to change a lot of my life around but I don't want them sent to foster care.'

Catherine paused. 'I'll help you Sara, with whatever you decide.'

Sara smiled. She knew what she was going to do.

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So that was chapter 5. Thanks for all the reviews you have sent me. Chapter 6 may be up soon, but I haven't started writing it yet and I don't know how hard it will be. I was planning to end it after Chapter 4 (if I put in a suitable ending of course) but all the positive responses I have gotten from this story makes me want to make it into a short series. But we will see how it turns out. So thanks again to the loyal readers and the reviews. I NEED YOUR REVIEWS! 


	6. Chapter 6

First of all I have to apologise for not updating this in a while. It took me a while to get inspiration to write this chapter. But I want to thank everyone for reviewing. But I hope you enjoy this chapter.

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Sara looked in the bedroom. Three small breath sounds could be heard from inside. She smiled a little to herself as she thought about the short time the children had been with her, but the many happy memories she had of that time. She wiped away a tear that had escaped from her eye thinking of all the things they went through. Sara couldn't do anything to change their past, but she sure as hell was going to change their future, for the better. 

Sara closed the door gently and looked around her new house. Two of the other bedrooms were still getting decorated so all three of the children had to share one room, not that it bothered them much. The living room was already swamped with the new toys Sara had bought them. The new family sized fridge in the kitchen was filled with food, nothing like Sara's old fridge. There was constantly laundry to be done, dishes to be washed, cleaning and tidying up. But Sara loved every minute of it.

Sara looked at the new clock hanging on the wall in the kitchen. 6.00am. Work started soon. Sara made a decision to change shifts to make everything easier on her new family. She still saw the old team regularly but it wasn't the same. It was just another sacrifice she had to make.

Sighing, she walked into the bedroom again and woke the children up. Since the murder of their mother, the children didn't speak much. Sara was eager to get them a psychologist, something she didn't have as a child. She had found Dr Monroe, a child psychologist who had agreed to see the children once a week, the times fitted in with Sara's new schedule with work. Sara hoped it would prevent a breakdown later in life, something she had expected for a while. The children had helped with that. Sara had never felt happier.

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Sorry for the delay, and the short chapter. I thought I would just add in a little chapter just to let everyone know I am still alive and writing this. I can't say when the next chapter will be done, life is pretty stressful right now. I can promise everyone that it will be done. Keep your reviews coming. 

Sorry it's short!


	7. Chapter 7

I've been thinking that Sara needs a romance in the story. Any specific ships you would like to see? I was thinking more Nick/Sara but I am going to leave it up to the readers 'cause it's you that this story is for. Send in a review and tell me what you would like to see.

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'Morning Aunt Sara!' Kate shouted as Sara walked into the room. Leonard, at his sister's loud greeting also woke up and rushed into the bathroom before Kate.

'So you ready for school today sweetie?' Sara asked referring to her backpack sitting in the corner. Kate nodded her head and smiled.

After searching through the small wardrobe, Sara lay out two sets of clothes for Kate and Leonard to wear for the day - A pair of jeans and his favourite t-shirt for Leonard and a cute red and white checked dress for Kate. Jessica was still sound asleep when Sara gazed over the cot and picked her up.

'Morning Jessie.' Sara greeted chirpily. Slowly the infant's eyes opened but were quickly closed again at seeing the bright light. The crying soon started. Sara tried to hush her but the screaming got louder and louder. She tried changing her diaper, feeding her, playing with her but nothing worked.

Kate and Leonard had gotten dressed for school and still Jessica was screaming. So quickly Sara packed the kids into the car and drove to the school. After dropping them off, Sara contemplated calling into work to say she wouldn't be coming today. Instead she just thought Jessica had a tummy bug or something and drove to the kindergarten.

Sara glanced at the clock and realised that Jessica had been crying for an hour, non-stop.

'What's wrong baby? Hmm. Are you ill? Will we take you to the doctors?' Sara spoke softly while driving away from the school. She knew the infant wouldn't respond as she was crying too much but she hoped her voice would calm her down. Once Sara parked the car at the kindergarten, she changed her mind about taking Jessica today.

Driving back home, the crying settled to a loud whimper. 'Mommy, hurts.' Sara glanced in the mirror and saw her hold her neck.

'Shh baby. It will be okay. Mommy will take you to doctor today ok?' Jessica didn't respond as slowly her eyes closed, the crying stopped and she fell fast asleep.

Sara, glad of the newfound silence, let Jessica sleep. When she pulled up the driveway Sara opened the door and unstrapped Jessica from her baby seat. Lifting her up into her arms, Sara noticed that Jessica's neck felt a bit stiff. Not only that but her forehead was red hot. Closing the door over, she faced inside to find a thermometer. Laying the still sleeping toddler on the couch, she took her temperature. 40ºC – way over what it should be.

A few months ago Sara had read about what to do if a child is ill. She wanted to make sure she would know what to do in an emergency. Vaguely remembering what the book told her to do, Sara went and searched out the book. Turning to page 56 she read that Jessica would need a lot of liquids and rest. She also only needs to wear a nappy because of something to do with cooling down. Turning back to the sleeping Jessica, Sara took off her tiny pants and t-shirt.

Once they were removed, Sara froze. She didn't need to read a book to know what to do about this. Rushing into the kitchen she grabbed a glass tumbler from the cupboard and ran back into the living room. She pressed the glass over the angry red rash on the toddler's chest and was horrified to see it didn't go away. One word crept into her mind. Meningitis.

Grabbing Jessica, Sara raced to the car and quickly strapped her into her seat. Driving way too fast, Sara got to the hospital in record time and sprinted into the emergency room carrying Jessica.

'Someone please help. I think she has meningitis!' Tears began to stream down her face as a doctor ran over and took Jessica from her arms. A nurse soon came over to her and took her to a family room to wait. She sat for what seemed like hours waiting for any news just thinking about everything. It was commonly known a lot of children die from meningitis and many more become disabled from it. She hoped to God Jessica would be okay. A payphone sat lonely in the corner of the grey room, and it was only then that Sara remembered Kate and Leonard would need to be picked up from school soon.

Slowly she walked over to the phone and dialled a number.

'Hello,' a voice answered.

'Hi. It's me,' Sara began, hoping her voice wouldn't break. 'I'm at the hospital. Something is wrong with Jessie. Do you think you could pick up the children from school? I don't know how long I will be.'

'Sure Sara,' the voice on the other side continued. 'What's wrong with her?'

'I think she has meningitis, but the doctors haven't told me anything yet.'

'Shit Sara. I'm sure she will be okay. Listen, I've got to go. Call me later when you hear more.'

'Okay. Thanks.' She hung up just as a doctor walked through the door of the family room, his face did not reflect good news…

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So that was another short chapter. Remember I'm adding a ship so review and tell me who you want. I just want to thank all those people who have been reviewing it has been great reading them. Thanks to all the loyal reader who have been following this story, and I promise I wouldn't give up on this one. If you can't wait for the next chapter try reading my other stories. Thanks again. 


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for reviewing everyone. Thanks to everyone who submitted a ship too. As the majority was Cath/Sara that is what the ship will be. Right now it is more of a friendship but it may end up romance. So here is the next chapter. I hope you enjoy.

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Once Sara had hung up the phone on Catherine, she regretted not asking her to come out here to the hospital to stay with her. She felt like she was going to fall apart and she desperately needed someone to be here with her.

Sara felt like her world was about to end. She knew the look that the doctor had given her, she had given it to many families who came to identify a body. That look was sympathy. It represented death of a loved one. The doctor paused in front of Sara for a few seconds. He took in her appearance, her eyes were puffy from crying, hair messily smoothed down on her head and her nails- once neat and manicured were now messily chewed apart from being so nervous.

In his hand Doctor Benzene held the form the nurse made this young woman fill in when she first arrived. Apparently Jessica had a cold for the last few days, which only added to the diagnosis. The infant had only been with Miss Sidle for a few months, that was also written on the form.

'Miss Sidle?' Sara nodded slowly to the doctor's question. His voice was cold and regretful. 'I'm afraid I have some good news and some bad news.'

'Please tell me she isn't dead,' Sara's pained voice broke the silent room.

'No, that's the good news, but I'm afraid I can't promise you she will not be by this time tomorrow. You see, we have run some tests and discovered Jessica has a very aggressive form of meningitis. It's called amoebic meningitis.' From the blank look on Sara's face Doctor Benzene concluded she hadn't heard of it before. 'It is a very rare form of meningitis and only occurs in around 20 people per year in America.'

Sara had tears running down her face again. Jessica might die, that was all she could think about. 'So where did she get it from?'

'I was hoping that's what you could tell me. It is picked up from pools of fresh, still water of about 30c.' He could tell from her face, Sara was racking her brains thinking. 'This would of happened about 4 days ago, judging by how serious her condition is now.'

4 days, Sara thought. That was Saturday. What happened on Saturday? They went to the store, they picked up some food for a picnic and they went to the park. The park.

'Jessica fell into the pond at the park. I got her out straightaway; she was only under the water for a few seconds.'

Doctor Benzene nodded his head slowly. 'That's all it took. The amoeba was picked up through her nose and then moved to her brain causing it to swell and press against the spinal cord. In most cases this causes instant death, but so far Jessica has been extremely lucky. We have started her on a course of very strong antibiotics which we are hoping will help.'

Sara nodded slowly.

'I want you to be prepared for the worst. The survival rate is very low, and her immune system is so weak because she is young so her chances are slimmer.'

Sara sighed slowly. 'Can I see her?'

Doctor Benzene nodded. 'We had to put her on a ventilator and also anti-inflammatory drugs to try and reduce the pressure on her brain. We won't be sure of any lasting damage until she wakes up, but that won't be for a while because the antibiotics will be keeping her asleep.'

With a small voice Sara responded 'Okay.'

Doctor Benzene led Sara up two flights of stairs to the children's intensive care unit. Sara felt it was the longest 3 minutes of her life. All the time she kept screaming at her heart Jessica would be okay, but her head was screaming back that the chances are against her.

Sara watched as the doctor paused outside a room on a long hallway with many other rooms on it.

'Please don't be alarmed about the amount of wires and tubes all around her. Most of them are simply there just in case. A doctor will regularly be coming in to check on her and if anything is wrong just press the nurse call button beside her bed and a nurse will come and see you. I will keep you updated.' The doctor turned around and walked back down the stairs they came up and slowly Sara walked in the room.

No words could have prepared her for what she saw. Jessica, looking very pale and asleep, was lying in a small bed/cot. Two tubes went into her nose, one into her bladder, an IV into her hand and about 3 others that Sara didn't know what were for. The amount of machines that were there 'just in case' did anything but reassure her. A lonely chair sat in the corner of the all white room and a plain porcelain sink sat in another corner. The small table beside the bed had nothing but a jug of water and a cup and Sara made a metal note to get some pretty balloons and flowers to greet her for when she woke up, whenever that would be.

She took the chair from the corner and dragged it over to the side of the bed and took hold of Jessica's hand. It was more a comfort for her than for Jessica but it helped anyway. She looked into the face of the toddler for what felt like a lifetime. It was only when two hours later a knock at the door brought her out of her trance.

'Catherine? What are you doing here?'

'I came to see how you were. You sounded really upset on the phone a while ago I thought you needed someone. I got out here as soon as I could. I left Kate and Lennie with my mother, she has Lindsay anyway.'

'Thanks for coming Cath. I really needed someone.' Sara couldn't help stop the tears that were now falling down her face.

'Hey shh. It will be okay.' Catherine took Sara in her arms trying to comfort her but Sara pulled away.

Shaking her head. 'The doctor said she has amoeba meningitis. It's got a really high mortality rate. I've to prepare for the worst.'

'Aww Sara. Just hope for the best. I'll be here for you.'

It was just then a monitor from the bed started beeping furiously and a doctor and two nurses rushed inwhile Sara and Cath were rushed out.

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So that was chapter 8. Review please. 


	9. Chapter 9

I just need to thank everyone who had been reviewing and reading. It means a lot to me to have a lot of hits and reviews to this story. So thanks! xxxx Sorry about this chapter being so sad.

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They waited in the hallway for what seemed like forever. Neither spoke or made a sound. Sara sat opposite the door on a plastic seat and Catherine sat down beside her. Burying her head in her hands Sara tried desperately to block out the noises coming from the room Jessica was in. Catherine simply stared at window of the door. At the angle she was sitting at she couldn't see anything, and to be honest she didn't want to know. Sara had been told to expect the worse, and now Catherine expecting it too.

After about 5 minutes, Sara spoke softly with her face still buried in her hands.

'I don't want her to die.'

Catherine just looked at Sara, a bit surprised she spoke. 'Of course you don't. None of us do.'

'Yesterday I would never have thought this would happen. Hell.. even 6 hours ago everything was fine. I so want to be able to tell myself that everything will be okay. But it wont will it?'

'I really don't know Sara.' She looked at her sympathetically and clasped her hand that was resting on her lap. 'But I meant it. I'll be here.'

Sara lifted her head up and gave Catherine a small smile, which told Catherine everything she needed to know. Slowly her smile faded and the thought of Jessica returned to both of their minds. They waited for a while longer before a doctor stepped out of the room and stood in front of them. A few more people walked out the room and Sara panicked. 'If no-one is in there trying to save her she is already gone.'

'I am very sorry,' the male doctor regretfully said. 'We did everything we could but we had to put her on life support. We believe her brain swelled more and put too much pressure on the oxygen supply. We think she is brain dead due to the lack of oxygen, but more tests will be carried out soon.'

He paused and looked at the two women in front of him. Both had a glazed look over their eyes and a look of shock across their faces. Taking a deep breath he spoke again.

'I would tell your family to come say their goodbyes. If we are correct the only thing keeping her alive is the life support and if tests come back positive for brain dead, it will need to be turned off.' With that said, the young doctor focused on the tears now falling from the brunettes eyes. 'You can go in and see her now.' He slowly walked away.

Sara couldn't believe what she was hearing. Although the doctors had said the chances were slim, Sara still held on desperately to that thought and now.. Now she was told the chance had gone. Catherine slowly took Sara's hand and together they stood up and walked into the room.

The amount of tubes around Jessica's young body scared them both. Her skin had gotten much paler and her eyes remained closed. For a while both of the women just sat at the bedside neither wanting to speak.

'Sara, should I go phone my mother and tell her to take the kids over?' Catherine spoke slowly and quietly. At first she didn't think Sara heard as she didn't respond right away but she nodded slowly. Catherine didn't want to leave her alone but the children had a right to know what was going on.

The children came not long after the call made to them. The time went by in a blur for Sara. She just couldn't make her brain register to what was going on. It had hardly seemed fair. For two years she had lived with an abusive family and had made it out of that okay, and now she was lying there about to die because of something completely unrelated.

They had one beautiful night with her, holding her hand and talking to her softly, and then she was gone. Leonard understood what was happening and the salty tears which flowed from his eyes told everyone that. But Kate just sat with a blank look on her face watching everyone else around her cry. Vaguely she understood death. She understood that her real mommy wont be coming back. Leonard had explained to her that mommy was needed by the angels in heaven. He said that is what happened when people die. Kate didn't understand why everyone got sad when the angels took someone to heaven. So Kate just silently watched everyone crying.

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Well that is chapter 9 done. Sorry about killing Jessica, but it had to be done. Sorry about the delay too. Chapter 10 might be a little delayed but I'll be hoping to have it done in about a week.

Keep reviewing please, it helps me work faster.


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry it took so long. I hope you enjoy and thanks to everyone who reviews!

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The church wasn't packed, far from it. Some people from the lab came and a few of the neighbours but that was it. But right at the back pew a man sat accompanied by another two men. He watched as the coffin of his daughter was carried to the front of the church. The handcuffs hidden under his coat made him uncomfortable and it also made it difficult to wipe away his tears. At first, Sara sitting on the front pew didn't notice him. Kate who was sitting on Sara's lap didn't notice him either and neither did Leonard who sat to Sara's left. It was Lindsay Willows who noticed the strange man at the back, dressed all in black with two police men with him.

'Mom.' Lindsay hissed to her mother sitting next to her. 'Who's that strange man at the back?'

Catherine quickly turned around, noticing at once who he was. She slowly turned to her left, where Sara was sitting and tapped her shoulder. 'Sara. Look who turned up.'

Sara glanced around to see Bradley. After plucking up the courage she stood up and walked back to him.

'What the hell are you doing here? I never called you. I never told you to come here.'

Bradley looked up. Rage flaring in his eyes. 'The hospital called the prison. You couldn't possibly expect me not to come to my daughter's funeral!'

The two Sidle children at the front watched with fear as they saw their father. Neither wanted to think about him again nevertheless see him.

Sara sighed. Obviously not in the mood for a fight. 'You better not make a scene Brad or you are leaving.' She turned away and began to walk back to her seat at the front.

'Don't walk away from me bitch!' He stood up. Sara turned back to face him. 'If she was with me she would still be alive! I always knew you were incapable with looking after something. It wasn't a huge surprise when I found out you killed her.'

'I never killed her Bradley. It was an accident.' She whispered back, her voice filled with guilt and eyes filling with tears.

'Whatever Sara. I'm having my lawyer fight to get Kate and Leonard taken away from you now too. I don't care if they go into foster care; I want them away from you!'

'I meant it Bradley. Shut up or you can just drag your ass back to prison. I'll put up a good fight to keep them. Who do you think the court will believe? A murderer who abused his kids or me? Now sit down and shut up.'

Slowly Bradley sat down again. 'I may be in prison but I'm still going to try Sara.'

The service began a few minutes later. Both Sara and Bradley had calmed down a lot since the argument but the fear still rested in the pit of Sara's stomach. Losing Jessica was very difficult, but she had Kate and Leonard to keep her going. If they got taken away she didn't know what she would do.

Sara wanted to say a few words, but she was too upset to even think of anything. Leonard took her place at the front of the church. Sara watched proudly as the boy dressed smartly in a black suit took out a neatly folded piece of paper and stood up to read it.

'My love for you is like the wind. You can't see it, but you can feel it.' He took a deep breath and continued with his speech. A few minutes later he finished. Ending with 'Life sometimes plays a cruel joke, and we need to live with it.' As the young boy sat down again at his place, Sara wiped away a few tears.

Once the ceremony was over the mourners made their way to the cemetery not far from the church. Kate and Leonard both tightly grasped hold of Sara's hands as they watched the tiny coffin get lowered into the ground. Catherine watched Sara fight back the tears that had threatened to fall for the entire service. Everyone who was there held a single white rose in their hands which they then dropped on top of the tiny coffin once it was in the ground.

Slowly the crowd dispersed away, leaving only a handful of people standing there. Catherine who held Lindsay's hand and Sara who was holding onto Leonard and Kate stood staring at the mesmerising white roses now on top of the coffin. It was then the tears did flow from Sara's eyes. Her crying made Kate and Leonard start too and Catherine just watched, not knowing what to do.

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Well that's the end of chapter 10. Sorry I haven't updated in so long.. again! I guess I must just thank everyone for reading still. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I have never been to a funeral so I wasn't quite sure what exactly happens. I hope it was kind of believable. So please review, as I love to hear your feedback. The romance should start in the next chapter. 


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